Finding Magick With a Cronic Illness
Can I just start by saying how much I hate cancer….. I fucking hate it. I’m at a stable point in my stage 4 breast cancer battle, but honestly, I’m tired. Thanks to modern medicine I can live a several years with this crap, so this is why I refer to this stage as a chronic illness. However, my body is no longer what it was two and a half years ago. My surgery and the amount of the scar tissue in my abdomen has me so deformed looking. (I feel anyway) I am always tired and hurt from the hormone blockers I’m on. My joints swell, ankles, hands, face…all at weird times. Getting up without cramping in my body is a new goal in my morning routine. So is being able to walk without my feet absolutely killing me. Nausea comes and goes at weird times as well thanks to the oral chemo pill I take 21 days a month. Some evenings after a busy day at the shop I do nothing when I get home. So how does one add magick to days where you struggle?
I’m a very simple person when it comes to everyday magick. I’m also a morning person now so that’s when I like to do a little something for me and my practice.
This can be as simple as lighting an incense when I have my morning cup of coffee. Something I enjoy doing outside on a cool morning. It’s the perfect down time to enjoy the birds and calmness while slowly coming to life myself. Another simple mood setting thing to do is diffusing essential oils. I LOVE how it can change the mood in the house by uplifting, calming, motivating or grounding my energy. Of course if I have more time I will do a tarot reading for myself.
Before I leave the house for the day it’s another chore. Bracelets are an everyday thing for me if I leave the house. I have three that I wear on my left hand every day. Iolite, because it is said to aid in liver function. Something I desperately need as I process medication every day. Arfvedsonite because it helps with all the things. Grounding, anxiety, protection, positivity, inner peace and just staying calm when something chaotic is thrown your way. Finally, pyrite. On top of the normal “fool’s gold” and attracting wealth, pyrite boosts motivation and willpower. Maybe it’s what keeps me going every day. If it’s just those 3, I will feel complete not wearing anything on my right hand. However, I have anywhere between 5 and 7 bracelets I will wear on my right hand. Different piles, always the same order on my wrist no matter what pile I pick for the day. And I never mix my piles. Doesn’t feel right. So ya, maybe it’s a little OCD but really, if I don’t have them in the order they sit on my wrists, I can feel the difference.
Sitting outside though is one of the ways I just like to acknowledge the present. Cool evenings watching the clouds, listening to the water from my fountain or sprinklers. Listening again to the wildlife around me and just enjoying being here. Nighttime I love. Star gazing, catching a satellite moving across the sky or a shooting star. Some nights, things I can’t explain. But it’s so gorgeous. I go out late enough to close the doors on my chickens so I can gaze at the stars and the moon in whatever phase it’s in. Sometimes it gets emotional. We live in such a beautiful place and I am so glad to be here for however long that may be. So take in all the smells, sights and noises that you enjoy every chance you get. I know I do more so now. Thank for reading and being here. I hope your day is magickal.